Counselors Corner
It’s no secret that parenting is, by far, one of the most difficult jobs in our society. The idea of bringing a new life into this world and raising that life into a self-sufficient, happy, and healthy adult is not only daunting but, to many, terrifying. One of the most common problems when it comes to parenting is healthy discipline and boundaries. Where do we draw the line? Where do I find the line? What in the world is the line? For many, this concept is clear and traditions of discipline have been passed down from generation to generation. For some, the concept of disciplining children is hazy and anxiety provoking.
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I first met A about 2 years ago. She was seeking counseling to receive help coming to terms with her diagnosis of Stage 4 breast cancer. A had been first diagnosed with Stage 2 breast cancer in 2012. She received intensive treatment and went into remission. She and her children, her husband and her extensive extended family were beginning to feel safe from cancer. However, she had a recurrence in 2015 and learned that the cancer had spread into her bones. She was diagnosed with Stage 4 cancer. A once again began receiving treatment for cancer and continued doing so when we began working together.
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Several months ago I wrote an article for River Region’s Journey about trust. After more thought, I have realized the importance of looking at any concept through multiple lenses. Trust is a complex concept. Trust is important in clinical work, but it is important in any relationship. A patient introduced me to Brene Brown. If you visit her website, brenebrown.com, you will find multiple videos on TedTalks, YouTube, and the Oprah Winfrey Network (OWN). She begins with an anecdote about her 3rd grader who shared some hard things about herself with a couple of friends. When she later walked into her classroom, many children pointed at her and laughed. When telling her mother this story, she said, “I will never trust anybody again.” This is a decision that will isolate any of us as long as we refuse to trust anyone.
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May is mental health month and the Alabama Department of Mental Health is focusing on overall health and well being. Our overall well being includes both our physical and mental health. The theme the department has chosen for this year is Fitness#4mind4 body.
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I fondly remember learning how to drive. My mother was dead-set on driving lessons so that I would be prepared to operate a 2000 pound piece of machinery on a road packed with not only pedestrians, but cute fluffy animals. I studied day and night to earn my permit, drove with instructor Ms. Burton for 6 months and passed my road-test on the first go ‘round. It was official; I was a licensed vehicle operator with all the privileges therein vested in my 16 year-old abilities.
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In Christian theology, there is something called “dark night of the soul”. This refers to a feeling of despair and no known way to end suffering. This term is also used in in the world of psychological dynamics seen as depression, despair and anxiety when they become so severe that they interfere with having a life that has moments of joy as well as difficulties. There are many perspectives of “a dark night of the soul,” but as a therapist and a Christian, I have come to view a feeling of separation from God as a “dark night of the soul”.
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Spring has sprung! The azaleas are in bloom, and new life sprouts all around us.
For Christians, the Easter celebration of the resurrection of Jesus is the ultimate spring – the reminder of the new life we have in Christ. Many Christian traditions observe Lent, the 40-day period before Easter of self-examination and reflection that can prepare us for the full joy of Easter. Observation of Lent is an ancient Christian tradition, a season of penitence, repentance, prayer and fasting leading to a renewal of the soul to allow for greater dedication to serving God and others in the coming year.
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Wednesday, 21 February 2018 11:58
Your Relationships: Healthy or Not?
Written by Jessica Gibbs-Fernandez, Ph.D.
The human brain pushes individuals to relate in groups, families, and the community. As well, and most importantly, humans have the drive to be in “meaningful” relationships (from marriages, friendships, even children/parents). There are healthy relationships that have “manageable problems”, and then there are toxic relationships that are destructive to mind, body, and spirit.
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Four days before Christmas, I found myself at the Montgomery Humane Society adopting a beautiful little black puppy.
I was finally ready after losing my beloved 11-year-old shelter dog to cancer last year. He was named Clarence, after the guardian angel inIt’s a Wonderful Life, because I truly believe that he was a gift from God to give me hope and comfort during an extremely difficult time in my life.
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Wednesday, 13 December 2017 09:10
Tips for Getting Through the Holidays with Relatives
Written by Candyce Anderson, LPC
The holiday season is upon us. A time for fun, fruitcake and family - our lovely relatives. Family ties form in many ways, whether by blood, marriage, adoption or the bond of life experiences such as military service, our college years or maybe a life-long friend. While many of us light up at the thought of spending hours drinking hot chocolate and ogling old family photos, others of us become anxious at the idea of being around family members.
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